Busy Weekend

Last night we had James' Uncle Richard and his wife Geana over for dinner. It was a homemade lasagna and garlic toast. It turned out pretty well. Everyone said it was good, Tyler had three helpings and told his mom it was better than hers. Woohoo! I like when people like my food enough to go back for more. I think of that as a compliment in itself.

Jessica wanted to show Geana her room, then her brothers room. While we were doing that, Richard decided to take a look at our room.... the bed wasn't made and it had baskets of laundry, it looked like a tornado hit it. ugh! Oh well, no house is perfect. When you open a closed door, you have to expect there is a reason the door wasn't open in the first place. He didn't say anything about it but I was embarrassed anyway. I decided not to let it ruin my night, I slapped on a smile and we went back to the kitchen.

When I went to make the garlic toast, I realized I only had garlic salt, no garlic powder... I sent James and email and asked him to bring home garlic powder when he got off of work. The lasagna was ready when everyone got here but the toast took a few extra minutes. James decided to ask me in front of everyone... "Did you get a late start babe?" UGH! He was trying to make an excuses for me. I know he saw it as helping but I was a little insulted. I didn't think there was anything wrong with the truth, 'I was out of garlic powder, dinner will be ready in a few minutes.' You can't fault a guy for trying to help... It just kind of bothered me that he thought I was messing up so bad that he had to help make me look better. It's important what your husband thinks of you and apparently right then, mine wasn't thinking too highly of me.

Overall it was a good night, everyone liked the food and we got to chit chat for awhile. Tyler is a good kid. He and Richard seemed to have a good time watching wrestling. Geana talked. Everytime I've met her before, she seemed kind of quiet but last night she was very talkative. I really enjoyed it. She seems to be a really sweet woman.

James had said last night that he wanted to take the left over lasagna to work today for lunch but he forgot it this morning. I offered to take it to him but he isn't sure when he could meet me downstairs to get it so, when he does have time, he will eat out for lunch today. Guess that means that the girls and I will get to eat it for lunch instead.

We are having people over to play games tonight. Apparently James and I had different ideas when we discussed this. I thought we were having a game night so that his cousin Jeannie and her son Hunter would have a reason to come and hang out with us so, we would invite her and one other friend so that we could play boys against girls etc. It seems James thought we were having a party, with games. He invited two couples from work, one of which has 2 kids... that is 9 people here tonight in addition to our 4. I really wasn't prepared to play the hostess to so many people this evening. So, I told James, I will have snacks on the counter but I am not cooking dinner for all of these people. If I can find a way to make sure all of the drinks and snacks are out when everyone gets here and let everyone serve themselves with paper plates, plastic forks and plastic cups, this should be fun and hopefully not a ton of work. We are going to play catch phrase, it's sort of like a home version of the game show password. It's a lot of fun. We've played it once before, my 10 yr old niece was there and one of the words was prophylactic; We passed on that word. It is hilarious to see what people come up with to describe some of these words. When the word was "witch" the person turned to James and said, "Your ex-wife is one of these." James got it on the first guess. HA!

James left me a to do list this morning. I have to call all of the guests that he invited to confirm whether or not they'll be coming, go to walmart and buy snacks and pick up the game. It's a short list but still a list. haha

I have a dilemma. James' friend Todd invited 'us' to go with he and his wife to the Hornets/Suns game on Monday night. I don't care at all about Basketball but I do like doing things with my husband. Todd is someone that we are fairly sure is having an affair. Apparently, he received a delivery at work signed "Your Butterfly" he said it wasn't from his wife but wouldn't say who it was from. Once when we were at his house, he and I got into a politcal discussion, I felt like he went too far and I was very upset and asked James if we could go home. He refused. About a month ago James called after work on a Saturday and said that Todd wanted to take him out for a beer, he'd be home in 30 minutes tops, he promised one beer. There were things that the girls and I were waiting on James for here at home but a half hour is not a big deal so, I said "OK, no big deal." Almost two hours and several lies later, James finally came home with no concern for the fact that the girls and I were ready and waiting for him when he got off of work and were still waiting... Now, Todd says the same day that he invited us to the game, his wife gave away one of the tickets. I am no longer invited. James still wants to go but says it's up to me. I am thinking, it's the Suns, the Suns are James' favorite basketball team; This could be his last chance to see them play in Oklahoma at most he may have another chance next year but who knows if we'll have the time or money for him to go then and there is no guarantee that he'll get that chance next year even if our schedule is clear and we are rolling in money, the hornets may play the suns in New Orleans next year. Of course he should go. Right? My solution, lets ditch Todd and just go to the game together. His response, it's a sold out game. James has night classes Tuesday and Wednesday, if he goes to this game without me on Monday then from I won't see him from Sunday night to Thursday night, with the exception of getting to watch him snore. On one hand I don't want him to miss this game and it's not his fault that the second ticket fell thru. How important is basketball? Is it worth not seeing each other for half of a week? Is it worth encouraging James to spend time with someone who seems ok with infidelity and who has already had no problem encouraging James to lie to me. Who is this person who got the other ticket? Why can't they be the ones who are told, "oops my husband already gave away the extra ticket"? I already got a sitter on a Monday night, which I hate to do, I think kids should be at home in bed during a school week but going to this game with James was important enough for an exception. I don't want him to go, but I don't want to be that kind of controlling, needy wife either. I can't change James' ideas but it would be so much easier if James just didn't think that he should be going out with couples without his wife and that was the end. It would even be easier if he was just a jerk and said "I'm going, deal with it." Then I could just be mad. But this, this is a big decision and it's really eating at me. I don't want him to miss out, I don't want to be selfish but I like doing things with my husband, this is going to be a lifelong memory for him and I won't be a part of it. I know he probably isn't looking at it like that but it still hurts my feelings that he doesn't mind going without me and not only without me, with someone that I don't trust.
I guess, if you can't trust your husband, you shouldn't be married to him. In the end, I guess that means I just have to take Todd out of the picture, keep making a choice to trust my husband and give him a chance to prove that I made the right decision.