Progress

Ok, it's been awhile since I blogged. Things have been crazy and if you don't have anything good to blog.... ha

I will start with the day after Christmas. We all got up and around fairly early, these kids don't know what it means to sleep in. Ha! We knew we'd probably have hard times getting Christian for his birthday so we decided to celebrate it a day early. We had pancakes for breakfast then headed to the zoo. After a couple of hours there we came back home and I started to work on his birthday cake. He picked the cake and the icing. They were both pink! James was a little sad about the pink cake but we wanted to give him the cake that he wanted so, once James was sure that Christian had seen all of the other cool colors and he still wanted pink, pink it was. My parents, Aunt Jana, Cousin Sara, brother Thomas, brother Danny and his wife Angela and all four of their kids came over for a birthday party that night. Once everyone was gone, we had to wait for Rachel to pick up Christian at 9:30. She wasn't as angry and violent as usual but she was set on letting James know that he will not have Christian again because she had filed for sole custody. At that time, we still had not even been served.

We were finally served on Tuesday night, December 27th, about 6:50pm. It was Christian's birthday. James was still at work but a very nice looking plain clothes man aside from wearing a badge around his neck knocked on the door. He looked a little nervous when I answered. I know they must meet with alot of angry people. He asked for James, I told him he was at work. He asked a series of questions, my age, if I was his wife, my name... I answered everything with a smile, he still seemed nervous when he started to hand me the papers, so I asked "Are we finally getting served?", again with a smile. He said yes, that he's tried before but we weren't home and he seemed a little more at ease. I told him that I was happy to have the papers and thanked him for dropping them off. I've never been served before but I think it went pretty well. I kinda felt bad for the guy who served me. It's his job to get in the middle of other people's drama. It must get ugly sometimes. I read the papers, still no court date but it did say that we had 20 days to file a response.

We have secured the services of a very nice attorney in norman who specializes in father's rights. He has 3 kids of his own, he seems to be very down to earth. He says he knows Rachel's attorney, he's an older gentleman who likes to drag things out, try to make you tired, wear you down. He already has a plan of action. He read the original divorce papers, he said that he has not been getting the visitation he is entitled to so he is going to file a motion to enforce and at that point we should get dates for the custody hearing set. He is also going to request a first right of refusal so that if Rachel needs a sitter, she has to call us first. He did some math and determined that James has been paying too much child support for all of this time, we can't undo that but he will get it set right for the future. In my calculations it's only about a $25 difference each month, which isn't a really big deal right now. Being upset about a $25 over payment while being faced with the threat of losing his son would be too petty. One other thing that I was happy to hear is that he said he will request a court appointed attorney for Christian, to represent his best interests.

James seems to believe that Buddy, Louise and Rachel expect him not to fight back at all, to just allow all of this to happen. If that is true, they are in for a big surprise.

We actually had a nice morning together. We took the girls to daycare on our way out of town, we made it to norman about a half hour early so we stopped and had breakfast together, something we rarely get to do alone. The drive gave us lots of time to talk, in peace. Just as much as I love playing with the kids and hearing thier giggles, I also have learned to value quiet when I can come by it.

Yesterday, I got a call from DHS. The girls daycare had used me as a reference. They have had some issues with a child getting hurt at school and the parents filed a report on it. When the lady on the phone first introduced herself as being from DHS, I thought that it must be related to the custody case. I am not happy to know that their daycare is having issues but I was relieved that it was about someone else's drama, not our own. I am very happy with our daycare, anytime that I've had a concern, it's always been handled effieciently and the kids don't dread going. That to me says alot, until we found this center, I used to have to leave Jessica crying every morning when I went to work. My kids have never been hurt at that center in any way that isn't usual when kids play, the occasional skined knee or scratch from a baby fight. So, I only had good things to say.

I can't wait for a day when we have custody of all three of our kids, James has graduated and our lives are boring and my only concern for the day is "What am I going to cook my family for dinner?".